The Gossip Around Garden VI

[wr_gossip]

Greetings Balamb Garden,

It seems that our lovely school has made a severe splash! And what better way to dish out the goods with a prized column from yours truly! Let the games truly begin!



If you don't know about a recent marriage that occurred here, then you're sleeping under a rock! But what's this?! Is Instructor Snow Villers chatting with the bride to be? Or is she an evil twin sister out to ruin Grell's life?! Either way, both redheads have a keen eye for hunks! Side note: Snow is unattached!!

And finally Espio is wearing pants! But how long will that streaker keep them on?!

Moving on to the Holi events, there is a plethora of juicy details! Is Kate Bishop really hitting on Instructor Shadow?! With that slingshot of hers, she's certainly allowed to aim high! Shadow may as well take on the opportunity, since Claire Farron is having secret rendezvous with Cid Raines! What a sordid web!

An odd pairing of a pastel pony named Rainbow Dash (that's really her name!) and a vertically challenged cadet of Edward Elric seems to have cropped up. The only thing they have in common is their propensity for stubbornness! But anything can happen here, all thanks to Time Compression! We're all rooting for you both! Edward better keep his eye on the skies, and not on Instructor Pinkie Pie! Instructor Champloo will easily stir-fry that little rump to perfection!

And when will Gakupo make the moves on the head of the Garden Festival Committee?! Mikuru is ripe for the taking and eager for all the things he encompasses! He'd better hurry before Instructor Snow gets involved with yet another underaged girl!

Let's all take a few steps back and observe that hot and sticky night of that bonfire that lit a fire in the pits of our bellies! Our lovely resident Queen of Hair, Rapunzel, was roasting marshmallows with Cissie King-Jones! The sticky goo of their treat is just a symbolization of what was in store later on that evening! Would Eugene mind a threesome?!

Instructor Tom strummed up a few chords with Gakupo, and they seem to make a wonderful melody! Will the screech of Instructor Sharpay Evans throw them off key?! Someone get her a tuning fork!

In our next issue, we'll try to cover those very fond couples, and some new ones! Such as the game of hard to get between Rose Lalonde and Kanaya Maryam. Love's better when one has to earn it!


Until next time, Garden!

Miss Tattler

Comments

[f8tal]

There is no hard to get 8etween Lalonde and Maryam!

[wr_gossip]

Where's your proof?!

[thorny]

[trolling instincts...too difficult to resist...]

You sound rather certain of that fact.

[moirailcompass]

:33 < dont listen to her vwhiskers
:33 < you know how she always is
:33 < most people know better than to take most of the stuff here
:33 < seriously now
:33 < so dont take it to heart ok?

[sylphoftealdeer]

[Vriska, don't. You're going to make Kanaya think you're actually jealous, and we all know that just can't be true... right?]

There Is No Need For You To Come To My Defense About Such A Meaningless Thing
Whoever Wrote This Trash Is Aiming For A Reaction And You Are Giving Them One

[thorny]

[jesus shitting christ EVEN WHEN THEY'RE NOT TALKING ABOUT DAVID SHE'S IN THIS DAMN RAG]

I'm beginning to wonder if perhaps this repeated showcasing of my alleged romantic escapades is merely a desperate cry for recognition from a secret admirer. There's few other possibilities that would explain the diligence with which you seem to be tracking my day to day activities.

[wr_gossip]

We don't like you that much! What an ego!

BBS;

[seethelanterns]

What...?

[wr_gossip]

Yes?

[elementofloyalty]

wait what

[wr_gossip]

Why the wait?!

[alwaysanarcher]

Now you're just reaching. I promise, if I'm head-over-heels for someone, it'd probably be more obvious.

- Cissie

[wr_gossip]

Reaching for what?

[sylphoftealdeer]

[There are many things Kanaya could say in reply to this absurdity, but in the end, she decides to go for the quickest and easiest way to convey her feelings, while still asking for more information in a decidedly eloquent manner.]

What

[wr_gossip]

When will people learn that this is an inappropriate response?! Full sentences please!!

[rewritethis]

WGHO ARE YOU CDSASLLINGH A RJUNT SO SMAKLL THATY IF HE WAS A COOKIIHNG INRGEDIENT HR'D ONLY BE A COBNDIMENT???? LDET"S XSEE HOW BIG YOYU CAN TSLK AFTER I RFIP OUT YOURT LUNGS AND FEED THEM RTO YOU!!!!!1

[Try to convince the whole of Garden that he's into ponies? Meh, someone's got too much time on their hands. "Vertically-challenged"? SIGNED YOUR GODDAMN DEATH WARRANT.]

[wr_gossip]

Wow!! What a temper!

[hotpinkwhirlwind]

[She's just going to ignore that mention of herself for once.]

Congratulations, Grell and Marco! I'm sorry I missed your big day.

[redcinemareel]

Thank you~! ♥

[lunar_princess]

[Oh thank goodness she flew under the radar for this nonsense, how she doesn't miss this kind of gossip.]

We assure you, miss, that Rainbow Dash is far more than just stubborness as you put it.

And do kindly stuff it before We make it a mission to hunt you down for such slanderous nonsense.

[wr_gossip]

[For now.]

We'll take your suggestion most kindly! [And discard it.]

BBS;

[guidethesun]

You must be new at this.

[wr_gossip]

No, YOU!!

[espio]

Less than fourteen hours, so far. I don't think I'll be adding to that total anytime soon, either.

[wr_gossip]

No idea what you mean, but welcome back!