The Gossip Around Garden VII

[wr_gossip]

Greetings Balamb Garden! Another quarter is upon us, so lets reflect back on the past for a bit as we recap the best of the best! We have a few twisted webs woven into our quaint school! Quite unprofessional and savory!

Our first bicycle of romance is none other than Pinkie Pie! Who would have guessed she could be such a vixen?! Her first victim is obviously Instructor Champloo. They are the ideal couple: crazed, unpredictable, and have a odd love for food! But even paradise gets dull after a while, so who can blame her for wanting to spice things up?! Why in the world would she choose that amazon, Maria Cyphert, though?! That girl is as stiff as seven day old French bread! Hopefully Pinkie found that out as she was getting a hands on approach to her impromptu dance lessons! Funny enough, Pinkie might be the one to loosen those muscles! But wait! It seems that Instructor Cranston has appeared and rekindled his relationship with Instructor Pie! That embrace sure was hot and steamy! Who knew Mister Cranston had such nice biceps?! Maria may have some competition!

The next bicycle up for riding goes by the name of Sigyn! With looks that gorgeous, it's no surprise that she has a flock of suitors! While she does stick to her age gap of Edward, who is quite deficient in height, she likes to aim high with Gakupo! He'd better be careful or he'll find himself in jail! Sigyn doesn't play fair, with how she engages him in physical activities by the pool! Be strong, Gakupo! Lets hope Edward can grow a few more inches to be of any competition!

Another uncanny and sinful pair is Jecht and Luna! Jecht likes to horse around in and out of the water! It's odd that Jecht has such good taste despite never wearing a shirt! How can Luna put up with such a tasteless man?! The real question is: who wears the least amount of clothing?!

You know what's really getting old?! Rose and David! We wish they would do something different than slow dancing and unhealthy amounts of incestuous makeouts! But perhaps Cid Raines and Claire Farron secret rendezvous can oust them from the top spot of Most Talked About Couple! Don't think no one notices you two sneaking off to that secret area! The walls have ears!

Last but not least, Rinoa has finally moved on from Commander Leonhart! It's about time! He's such a stick in the mud! She's smart to make moves on that new cadet, Chris! Best to whip them into shape while they're still fresh putty! With that gunblade of hers, that should be no problem! Just be careful not to build up like Maria has!

Keep the good news coming!


Until next time, Garden!

Miss Tattler

Comments

[fierybluebird]

Whoa... What? That can't be true about Rinoa.

[wr_gossip]

Can you really be sure?!

[fierybluebird]

[HONESTLY, he kind of wishes it was because maybe less heartbreak but...]

Not until I hear it from her personally.

[Video, then text]

[lunar_princess]

[Video starts with Luna staring at her screen with just a horrified expression, WHAT. EVEN. What even. How do they. Agh.

Then it switches to text, hah.]

YOU CUT THAT OUT RIGHT THIS INSTANT.

[Text]

[sublimelymagnificentblitz]

Hey, when have you been horsin' around in the water? I ain't ever seen it!

[Sorry, Jecht thinks this is HILARIOUS]

[Text]

[lunar_princess]

[Jecht. Jecht what.]

We have not! we think it was meant as some ridiculous kind of joke due to us being a pony...

[Txt]

[morphitudinous]

The trouble with the old advice 'ignore it until it goes away' is that it takes a while.

Come on, who would believe all of this nonsense?

[Text]

[lunar_princess]

You would be surprised how many would believe such a thing. Taking friendship as meaning something more, even when that would be... odd.

Though We must admit that he is a rather nice looking person, if nothing else.

... We never were good at ignoring these things.

[wr_gossip]

No way!

[alwaysanarcher]

You guys sure pay a lot of attention to Maria's love life.

- Cissie

[wr_gossip]

Or lack thereof!

[alwaysanarcher]

it's still more than some people ever get, LOL.

[she's just bitter that her own love life is utterly dismal.]

[fotlenke]

I am uncertain how you gathered such information.

[morphitudinous]

Lies and unfounded conjecture, no doubt.

[fotlenke]

Most likely.

Edward is not deficient in height. Eventually he will tower over me. It is obvious. All male warriors are the same.

Very handsome as well.

[wr_gossip]

Through old fashioned methods!

[fotlenke]

Honestly. You could at least show some respect for Edward.

And if you mean to think that I would chose Gakupo over Edward in a hypothetical situation of affections due to something so trivial as differences of stature, then you've thought wrong.

Edward can be very engaging when he is not irritated with me. And seeing as we have only just met, and this same goes for Instructor Gakupo, I think that choosing in affairs of the heart over appearances is shallow. However in this case, to calm your noisome gossip, I would like to say that I would gladly choose Edward.

[rebellingheart]

I'm not going to be a very good instructor if every time I talk to a cadet someone thinks it's romantic, Ms. Tattler.

[wr_gossip]

We doubt you'll be a very good instructor, period!

[rebellingheart]

Then I'll just have to prove you wrong.

[morphitudinous]

I feel obliged to point out the ridiculousness of the notion. Instructor Pie and I are good friends, but anything further would drive both of us up the wall. Spending five minutes with either of us makes that apparent, right?

[He doesn't take his own advice.]

[laughafterme]

We can't drive up walls!

[rebellingheart]

I was going to say that she didn't seem like your type.

[rewritethis]

Hey, Tattler, can I ask you something? Do you want to stop writing this useless crap NOW, or after I HGRIND YUOUR AERMS INTO PASTGE AND PAINMT THEM OVER YOUR EYUES//

[wr_gossip]

Can you ask in coherent words?