oo2; action; cafeteria

[subjuggloco.livejournal.com]

[Your name is GAMZEE MAKARA, and you are finding yourself faced with the biggest miracle you have ever caused in your life.

... okay, no, that's not right. Real formatting: Gamzee Makara, Witches Reign's one and only sopor-meister, is finding himself faced with the biggest miracle he has ever caused in his life.

Much better.

One might find Gamzee sitting in a table and looking incredibly amazed. Shocked. In a total stupor. Yes, while he is finding himself unable to touch his sylladex and reach for his bicycle horns or clubs, he is able to cause a miracle of a different kind now.

He literally bears the miracle of allowing Faygo and sopor pies to appear out of nowhere, along with miscellaneous, yet very minor and/or insignificant (to others, at least) miracles. No, really. He thinks that he's hankering for a pie right now, and suddenly, there is three! He then wants a Faygo, and suddenly, a 2-liter bottle appears next to him.

He couldn't comprehend these miracles. I mean, how the fuck does this kind of thing happen? What made these motherfuckers just pop out of nowhere?

Miracles is what.]

Comments

[needs-weird.livejournal.com]

Hi!

[]

Whoa! Is this normal for your planet? They're so big!

[]

1/2

[subjuggloco.livejournal.com]

[oh

oh my god

who is this person and why are they grabbing his horns?? this does not upset him but he is VERY CONFUSED

yet all he does is look lazily up at her.]

All motherfucking natural, motherfucker. Genuine, one-hundred-and-a-hundred percent Alternian shit right here.

2/2

[subjuggloco.livejournal.com]

And... man, that feels good. Give 'em a nice rub or something, sister, 'cause that's the fucking tits right there.

[... welp. He's gone from startled confusion to mellowed enjoyment now.]

[laughafterme]

HI GAMZ--WWWWHHHOOOOOOOOOOAAAAA

[HOMG LOOKIT ALL THE PIES AND FAYGO!!]

[needs-weird.livejournal.com]

[]

Like this?

[]

There you go! Now! Tell me about this "Alternia!"

[subjuggloco.livejournal.com]

Whoaaaaaaaaaaaaa-- HONK.

[Literally from his mouth and not his bicycle horns this time.]

Pinkie. Chica.

This motherfucker's got some serious fucking shit going down. Look at this.

I'm a motherfucking miracle fairy.

[subjuggloco.livejournal.com]

[Aww, this sister was really, really enthusiastic, but you know what? That's all good. Yeah, he can roll with this motherfucker. She's pretty nice, not to mention she's some fucking cuddle crusader, so he's gotta get to returning that right now.]

No motherfuckin' problem. What's a chick gotta know about it? I can tell you aaaall this brother knows.

[laughafterme]

[GAAAAAAASP!]

[She covers her mouth in awe, her blue eyes wide with wonder.]

You're a miracle fairy?!

[needs-weird.livejournal.com]

EVERYTHING.

[subjuggloco.livejournal.com]

A motherfucking miracle fairy, chica. I be real truthful and straight on you here.

Look, I want a motherfucking Faygo right now. The wine kind.

And now... shit, look what happened. Miracles is what happened.

[He points to her hair. THERE IS A BOTTLE OF FAYGEAUX CHATEAUX IN HER HAIR...]

[subjuggloco.livejournal.com]

Aw shit, that's a lot, sis. Lemme start from the top here. It's all dark and shit, and it's how we motherfucking like it. We don't like sun, 'cause that stuff's all gotta burn like a mofo.

And man, we got hives all over and it's just... man. They all fucking good. Nothing's better than a motherfucking cozy hive and all this slime in our 'coons and... shit.

Nothing like it.

[He dips his hand into one of his pies and takes a nice, slow lick from it.]

[laughafterme]

[And now she's balancing it on her head!]

Wooo! Wooo! Wooo!

[Oh right, fairy talk.]

Wooo! Woo!

[OKAY DONE.]

GIMME A SOPOR CUPCAKE WITH STRAWBERRY FROSTING AND RAINBOW SPRINKLES AND A CHERRY ON TOP!

[She's gonna make a party out of this. A MIRACLE PARTY.]

1/2

[subjuggloco.livejournal.com]

... Man, chica, I never had one of those before. Sounds pimping and all, but I dunno if a motherfucker can get... to...

2/2

[subjuggloco.livejournal.com]

[There it is.

A sopor cupcake with strawberry frosting, rainbow sprinkles, and heavens to betsy, a cherry on top!!

HE IS JUST STARING AT IT IN AMAZEMENT.]

... Man. I can do any motherfucking miracle.

Shit. I am a motherfucking fairy sent from the messiahs. I gotta be. Just... maaaaaaaan.

[needs-weird.livejournal.com]

[]

What's that, then? Alien food? What's your diet like?

[subjuggloco.livejournal.com]

My other brothers don't get to eat this shit. I dunno why, 'cause man... nothing else makes a motherfucker feel better than this.

I eat this and a whole motherfucking bunch of fruit and shit, but it's mostly my sweet-ass sopor. I sleep in this shit and eat it. S'all good.

And I drink this sweetnasty swill.

[He holds up a bottle of Faygo that just magically appeared in his hands. What.]

[laughafterme]

[After touching the cupcake tentatively, making sure it was real, and taking off the faygo from her head, Pinkie pulls him close by his color and looks into his little troll eyes with seriousness.]

Fill. This. Room. With CUPCAKES!

[She lets him go and stands on a chair with the cupcake, biting into it with a determined look.]

LET'S PARTY! MIRACLE STYLE!

[Gamzee...she's gonna abuse these miracles.]

Bring out the faygo, too!

[subjuggloco.livejournal.com]

You motherfucking KNOW it, chica!

[He repeats the phrase in his mind: 'Fill the room with some sweeeeet cupcakes.'

Eventually...]

[subjuggloco.livejournal.com]

[SEA OF CUPCAKES

JEGUS]

Holy ShIiIiIiIiT!!

[laughafterme]

AWESOME!

[She carefully slips down her chair and finishes off her cupcake. God, how she missed sopor...]

MIRACLES! You did it, Gamz! [Hugs for Gamzee!]

For he's a jolly good fellow!
For he's a jolly good fellow!
For he's a jolly good feeeelloooooowwwwww!

Which nobody can deny!

[Offers him a cupcake, then takes up her own.] CHEERS! [CUPCAKE BUNP!]

[subjuggloco.livejournal.com]

[He is still kind of in a stupor... er, more of a stupor than usual from the sudden invasion of cupcakes all over the cafeteria, but at least he responds to the COPCAEK BUNP....... with his own.

Yet he's staring off into the ocean. The ocean of sopor cupcakes.]

Shit, sister... I ain't never got this kinda power all into my hands, and now that I do, it's all motherfucking miracles from here. You get this shit, don't you, chica?

[He grabbed her by her shoulders and stared at her square in the eye. He... still didn't look very alert with doing it, though.]

I'm doing this, man.

I'm making this happen.

[and essay stops making stupid 'coincidental' sbahj references from here]

[laughafterme]

[Somehow, she eats her cupcake in two bites. Kinda slow for her, really.]

I totally get it--

[HUH?! A STARING CONTEST! Pinkie stares back, ready to not blink EVER again!]

Make it so, Gamz! Make it so.

[Yep, just breakin' down those fourth walls.]

1/?

[subjuggloco.livejournal.com]

Then I'm gonna motherfucking make it so.

It's time to go to the motherfucking paradise the messiahs have in store for us, chica.

[subjuggloco.livejournal.com]

[subjuggloco.livejournal.com]