witchesreign | BBS/Action (current day)

[he just grins down at Marco before using his stomach as a pillow]

As you wish.

[Snickers and pets the hair.] Inconceivable punk. [Traces along the scar in infinity circles.]

Oh I've conceived more than you can even imagine. [he closes his eyes and enjoys the soothing motion.] Didn't I tell you about the triplets I have in Water 7?

[Flushes and shakes his head.] Did you really?

[Muses to himself.] There should be a girl that can literally multiply herself. I'd date her.

If I wasn't married I mean.

Tell me about triplets. [CIIIIIRCLES.]

I meant children, you dipshit. You know, conceived? [oh well. He flaps a hand in the air] Forget it. It's not true anyway.I don't think. If I have sproglets I want to be the last one to know.

[Quickly does some math.]

Eh, you realize in a few years, all your spawnlings will come looking for you in the New World. We'll spot them by their giant hair obsession.

Oh God don't even say things like that. [a cold shudder went through him] There's a reason no one is ever going to call me pops, you know.

[GRINS EVILLY.]

You know I think I'm jealous. Can you imagine how thrilled Pops would be to have grandchildren to spoil?

Can't hear you. [he puts his hands over his ears] Not even listening. Don't even care. Not a damn bit.

[BUGS BUNNY STYLE KISSES THATCH'S FOREHEAD.]

Mwah.

I'd be the best damn Uncle ever. You should be jealous. Of my mad Uncle-ing skills. [Is it scarier that he's serious, or not?]

Be the Uncle of someone else's spawn. [Thatch flicks him in the forehead] Like Jozu, or Blamenco. Or, hell, even Whitey Bay. I heard she was hooking up with some Supernova Rookie from West Blue. That won't last.

West Blue...?

[Think think think... Meh. He only remembered a couple of the Supernova rookies. The interesting ones. Ace's little brother, and the Doctor who loved fluffy things and rescued Ace's little brother in a yellow submarine.]

I'm not sure I buy that. She has better taste than that, yoi.

Ace should have kids. They'd be adorable.

No, it's true. I heard it from her first mate's sister-in-law in Grand Floor. But I also heard that he she likes his muscles and he doesn't like women that are stronger than him--so who knows.

[he rubs his chin, skipping over the question of Sparks because that would only lead to tears and heartbreak]

Then of course there's Vista's Pinne. I know he had a piece on the side or two--actually I think he was trying to play the two women off each other and then Izou found out and you know how she is.

Huh. Maybe. But that couldn't last long then. She needs someone smarter. That straw or voodoo rookie maybe if she really wants to go younger.

[There's the briefest flicker of an expression. Thatch didn't take the bait about Ace. So he had to know something was up. But Marco breezed by it.]

Vista and his damn train tracks, yoi. He's lucky Izou didn't shoot him. [It was harder for Marco to feign interest in this part, since he already knew better how it played out. Thatch's death changed everything and Izou missed him as much as the rest of them, the panicking over Ace sent Vista back home and they rounded up the allies. Still, there was a part of him that did have a genuine interest, and Marco grins.] I mentioned our own Miss Tattler here on campus, right?

[Marco loves idle chatter like this. More listening than spreading it, and maybe discussing favorite ships among people, real or not. Which also is what has him dying to drop hints on who Miss Tattler is. Thatch and her would obviously bond well over it! Right? Right? Maybe not. It has him a little worried, but itching either way.]

Straw--? [Thatch groans and puts a hand over his eyes with a laugh] Please don't tell me you're talking about Luffy. Please tell me it's some other Straw kid whose name I don't have to hear over and over. Did you know that he was eaten by an anaconda once? Or that he sleeps with his mouth open? Or that one time he sneezed so hard a bean flew out of his nose?

[he laughs again]

But please, please tell me about this miss Tattler before I start talking about him myself.

[LAUGHS.] No no, not Ace's little brother. This guy turns into straw. Some sort of devil fruit.

[Strokes his chin and thinks it over.] Oh hey, hang on. [Goes back to his room and grabs a few of her past printings.]

I might just have an in with her.

Really? [all thoughts about rookies of any straw variety were banished as he read the printing. Give him a few minutes to pour it over as he absently ruffles your hair]

Wow. This is amazing. Do you have any more of these?

A dozen or so. [Sticks his tongue out and sifts through them to hand him another.] I warned you about her incest kink though.

Bah. Whatever sells. [he reads and reads and reads, utterly entranced] Can't really tell fact from fiction here--Haven't been here long enough--but wait til I do. I'll sort her out alright. [he rubs his chin]

[He laughs.]

Honestly I was hoping you'd give her more to write about! She seems to be losing her interest lately. Too much quiet around here and nothing sparking interest.

Oh I'll give her plenty. Even if I have to make it up. [he wraps an arm around Marco's shoulders] How about we have a torrid love affair under Grell's enthusiastic eye?

Sounds like a plan babydoll.

Let's see... [Holds up his fingers.] Incest, bestiality, S&M, a triangle, possible menagie trois, why do I feel like I'm missing something important though?

I don't know, but it sounds fun. [he pulls Marco a bit closer, caressing a hand through his hair] What say we get a head start?

Okay. But be gentle, I'm a virgin.

[It terrifies me that he says that in deadpan without cracking up.]

[He laughs]

Please. There hasn't been a part of you that hasn't been molested. [a fact that he knows from personal experience.]

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