witchesreign | Potions and Items, Desperately Needed [Open]

[The Itemcrafting classroom looks like something out of The Sword in the Stone today, with beakers, cauldrons, tubes, liquids, chests, and sundry supplies all floating around in midair, almost but not quite bumping into each other. On one side of the classroom, knives furiously chop away at roots, stalks, and bulbs; on another, large tongs stir boiling cauldrons. In the midst of all this, Slughorn directs traffic with his wand, hurrying here and there to check this process or temper this reaction.]

[Truth be told, Slughorn is running himself raw, between days of gathering up students on the Island and nights of making items and potions to repair the damage they've done to themselves. A very uncharacteristic scowl seems to have landed permanently on his face, and he is constantly mopping at the shine on his increasingly-mottled forehead. In fact, one might almost say he's showing his age...]

Don't even know why I came out of retirement. What am I, a Healer?

[He flicks his wand irritably, sending two completed sleeping draughts and a half-dozen Potions flying into a box.]

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[With excessive care, she gets up and carries the box over to the counter.]

One, two... Oh? [She looks down at the third sprig she just tried to pick up, and tugs at it ineffectually.] Aw, hey, are the rest of these supposed to be all tangled together like this?

No. No, they most certainly are not. Do untangle them.

Untangle them? Okay! Let's see here...

[She gets to work immediately, trying to unhook the tiny dried-up branches from each other without damaging them. The keyword is "trying". After about five minutes, she's succeeded in adding both of the sprigs she originally took out into the mess, which is starting to resemble something from a topologist's nightmare.]

Just hold on one second... I'm nearly there...

[Another minute or so of industrious rustling, she drops the entire tangle on the floor. It bounces once, trailing disintegrating fragments of delicate leaves, and rolls out of sight.]

Aah! Where did it -

[Osaka kneels down, then changes her mind and lies flat on the floor to squint at the gap between the base of the counter and the floor. There, the knotted-up plants sit peacefully just out of her reach, resigned to their place in the universe.]

...Oh.

[Slughorn, having given his order, had returned to his own work; he had little time for leisure, and no reason to expect... well, what happened. When he glances over, it's to see her having dropped something. Fair enough; everyone makes mistakes. He gestures with his wand and speaks the Summoning Charm pleasantly enough.]

Accio.

[The tangled ball zips to his hand; Slughorn immediately recoils in shock, dropping the sprigs onto a counter and shaking his hand as if shocked.]

I -- yes, well, good effort...

[Oh no, he noticed. Osaka looks too flustered by this turn of events to comment on how the tangle flew off by itself; she scrambles to her feet, turns to Slughorn and throws herself into... well, in practice it isn't a particularly low bow since she isn't flexible enough, but it's clearly intended to be one.]

I... I'm awful sorry! I thought I was getting somewhere, I promise I did!

No matter. I'm certain we must make allowances for a rather tricky plant. Herbology's not on the course list here, after all.

[He clears his throat, attempting to regain his bearings, then prods at the tangle with his wand.]

Something easier. Bring me a spearmint leaf.

[He gestures idly at his complicated supply trunk.]

Spearmint leaf! I hear ya!

[She ambles over to the trunk with the air of a professional getting ready to wrangle a crocodile.

This time, she works much faster - it's barely a minute before she neatly closes the trunk and heads back over to where Slughorn is. However, her expression of triumph notwithstanding, what she's holding in her hands... isn't a spearmint leaf. In fact, it isn't any kind of leaf.]

This is what you said, right?

[Slughorn looks long and measuredly at her offering, then resolutely grasps the one possibility that might save his sanity.]

Out of curiosity, is that what leaves look like on your world?

[This wasn't the reaction she was hoping for. She looks back up at him like a kicked puppy.] Oh... it was a leaf you wanted. Gotcha. Sorry again. I must've misheard you or something. [Then she looks down at her hands.] Guess I should've known. Nobody would put a bunch of big old teeth in their suitcase unless it was an accident.

Now one moment! Teeth from a variety of creatures are valuable ingredients for Potions. For example, shark's teeth are a vital part of the recipe for Skele-Gro!

[She blinks.] Ah, really? Wow, I never knew anything like that. I thought you only found that kind of thing in old folk remedies and stuff along those lines. [To her credit, she sounds genuinely fascinated.] So does that mean you're supposed to count the teeth as part of someone's skeleton after all?

Yes, of course! Why would you not? But this isn't 'old folk' remedies -- this is Potions! A magical art. Not something a Muggle would appreciate, of course.

I dunno! I guess it always confused me a little, you know? I mean, when you see pictures of skeletons and stuff like that, they always have all of the teeth left in, but... if you had a can of fish and the label on the outside said "may contain bones", except then you opened it up and found a bunch of somebody's teeth in there instead, you'd be kinda surprised, wouldn't you?

[...okay, she may not be fascinated with exactly what he might have been hoping she was interested in.]

You would also be surprised if you found a human bone in there. Accurate as the label may be in that case.

[Slughorn makes a game attempt to encourage critical thinking in a student. This won't end well.]

Oh, yeah, that's true. You're probably right. [She tilts her head to one side.] Though, you know... if that happened to me, I'm not sure if I'd be more worried about how whoever wrote the label knew it was in there in the first place, personally. I mean, if they didn't put it in there and they just wanted to warn people about it, that'd show some real strength of character, but what if they did?

[Did... this go down a sensible if insane path? Slughorn can't tell any more.]

The broader point remains. You would prefer sardines in your tin. Not human bones of any sort, warned or not.

I dunno. Sardines are okay, but we don't buy them that often. [Osaka looks thoughtfully down at the handful of teeth she's holding again.] Although I guess that's for the better if all the cans are just gonna be full of people's bones. How do you think the label writers fit them in there, do you know? Wouldn't you have to snap them in half or something first? Kinda seems like they didn't think this through.

[Slughorn goes from attempting (and failing) to interrupt this chain of thought to just sputtering a little.]

The spearmint leaf! Can we make another attempt at getting that, please? I've potions to make!

Oh, right! Yeah, I'm on it!

[She ambles back over to the supply trunk, but hesitates before diving back into it.]

Uh, but wait, what d'you think I should do with these? [She's pointing to her handful of teeth. Well, slightly less than a handful now that she's dropped a couple of them on the way, but she hasn't noticed, so surely nobody else has.]

Please replace them where you found them. Precisely where you found them.

Potions and Items, Desperately Needed [Open]

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