Handy Explanations [BBS]

[vocaloidiot]

Alright, since people keep looking at us funny when we use the computers, here's a handy explanation as to why some people in Garden like sticking cables in their ear. (Don't try that at home, kids! We're professionals!)

Robots walk amongst you! Dun dun duuuuuuuuuuun! ... but don't worry, only four of them at the moment. We're pretty nice, too, friendly, outgoing, a notable lack of lasers or onboard missiles or any real desire to take over the world!--well, except for the angry blonde midget, maybe, but she's an entire warning unto herself.

Not that you'd even tell we're robots, really! I mean, we've got skin tone and aren't outwardly metallic, we eat if we feel like it and sleep while we recharge. The only real difference from you guys is that we're a good whack heavier than normal, so you'd never really know you were looking at one unless we did something obvious.

... like plugging ourselves direct into the terminals, for one. It's just faster to manage the typing that way, that's all! Alternatively, sometimes we'll have to run some diagnostics or system stuff by ... well, opening access panels on our limbs. Ah, to whichever female cadet I scared off the other day, it's okay, I'm not a cutter, I promise. Sorry for attempting to rip my arm open in front of you, the catch kind of got stuck in my scarf.

if we're being serious for a moment, we're technically waterproof but some warning before dunking us into the sea would be really kind of handy. also please, please try to avoid using Bolt right next to us in the training centre, it's just a hazard for everyone involved

So now you know what to gloss over, here's who you're looking out for.

	Frankly, even speaking completely without bias, this guy is pretty awesome. Check out that suave, betousled hair and that manly chin, that noble visage. This guy, Kaito, is a fine specimen of robotdom and a stalwart companion. How could you resist?
	Luka is the purveyor of the Angry Glare of Death, where her eyes go all shadowy like this and then she pierces you with the withering stare of a thousand angry music critics. All questions of an electronically philosophical or religious nature are best sent to her.
	Miku's super-friendly, bubbly, and polite outwards visage hides an evil secret! She's actually [REDACTED FOR PUBLIC SAFETY]
	VERY DANGER! Rin is deadly and should be considered armed and petulant at all times! Her secret mission, charged with world domination, rules over the rest of her programming! Particularly threatening to the Kaito genus of robot, to whom she is a big fat bully. All the time. If possible, divert her attention onto the flying blond one with the bruises, except he's too lazy as to have turned up yet. Jerk.
	Not actually a robot! We're as surprised as you are, but there you go; if you hear one of the guys above refer to him as such, ignore them because they're kind of confused by the whole thing.

Comments

[soundcirculates.livejournal.com]

TO ANYONE READING:

I am one of the robots in question. You can plainly see this highly-anonymous poster's description of me for yourself, though I would not deign use those particular words of my own accord. While some foolish and potentially malfunctioning part of me is still convinced that Kaito's intentions are good (though the overall outcome rarely reflects this fact), I'm afraid there are a fair number of discrepancies. Firstly:

Luka is the purveyor of the Angry Glare of Death [...]

I would like the record to show that I officially resent this remark. The only reasons I've found to ever glare at anyone have been few and far between (for reference, such instances tend to revolve around my family members being threatened/upset/bullied/treated unfairly/etc – and I am certain that most people would react similarly under those circumstances – or the last of the tuna being eaten without my knowledge), and I certainly do not wish something as extreme as death upon anyone of an organic nature.

[... ] where her eyes go all shadowy like this and then she pierces you with the withering stare of a thousand angry music critics.

I'm not certain how deep in his hard drive Kaito had to dig to find that particular image, but rest assured, it's not an expression I'm wont to make with any sort of regularity. It's rather unflattering.

All questions of an electronically philosophical or religious nature are best sent to [Luka].

This part, I can, however, agree with. In the interest of accuracy, and providing as much information as possible, I would like to make one small alteration:

All questions of an electronically philosophical or religious nature are best sent to [Luka].

I would be more than happy to answer any questions you may have on the subject of almost anything at all. Yes, I'm happy to explain how we as robots function, and provide demonstrations; no, you may not touch my circuit boards, or attempt to “interface” with me. With the obvious jokes pre-empted, let me just say that I honestly would love to help dispel any sort of confusion that any of you may face. Please do try to think of us as equals, rather than toys; just because we're altogether lacking in the beating heart department doesn't mean that our feelings deserve to be dismissed.

I'll leave Rin and Miku to handle their own commentary.

[dewdrop-pebbles.livejournal.com]

Thank you for explaining further. I am quite curious, now that I am further aware, though well understand the need for equal treatment. It is difficult enough adjusting to a new environment without being ridiculed, as well.

As for the inaccurate and unflattering, I shall dismiss it. I found you to be quiet pleasant and am grateful for the aid you provided me earlier.

[soundcirculates.livejournal.com]

Why thank you. In hindsight, I doubt anyone will take this too seriously; there's just something about Kaito that makes me quick to anger.

Still, you're more than welcome for the information. The more people know about us, the easier it'll be for us to settle in, I believe.

/what is this, I don't even...

[fierybluebird]

So you guys are robots of music, but not together in a band? I still think it'd be more effective if it was a band.

Do you have a perfect eight octave range?

[soundcirculates.livejournal.com]

I do.

While we aren't a band for a number of reasons (there are far too many of us to coordinate that sort of thing, and we were all created at different times) we do record and release songs together fairly often. Miku and I, for example, have a rather wide range of love songs, and other such duets, and Rin and Len are often paired together; we also perform concerts together. Although we were built by the same company, we're usually in competition with one another. Nobody wants to become obsolete.

[soundcirculates.livejournal.com]

KAITO:

So help me, Kaito, I will forcefully override your system and have you running Windows 95 for the next month.

[vocaloidiot]

I don't know who you mean! I am just a passing handy informative minstrel.

[soundcirculates.livejournal.com]

Check out that suave, betousled hair and that manly chin, that noble visage. This guy, Kaito, is a fine specimen of robotdom and a stalwart companion.

Only an old model could be so very delusional.

[vocavoice.livejournal.com]

[soundcirculates.livejournal.com]

No, you're not. Please don't pay this any heed, Miku.

[vocavoice.livejournal.com]

[vocaloidiot]

--relax, relax! I'm just kidding around!

[vocavoice.livejournal.com]

[runaway-chosen.livejournal.com]

So there really are robots here! Wow!

[vocaloidiot]

It's true! Right here in the flesh-- well, sort-of-flesh!

[eggplantallergy]

I'm not so sure I agree with those descriptions of yourself, Kaito. And Rin isn't that dangerous! Wanting to ride a Chocobo doesn't exude danger. There's another robot named Miku here too? She seems friendly enough.


...why did you choose that picture of me?!

It's alright if you're all confused. I am too, since all of you are similar to friends back home in my world. The only robotic thing about me are my ears!

[vocaloidiot]

Hahah, Miku's fine! Ah, but Rin...

[eggplantallergy]

Maybe if you stay on her good side you should be fine?

[problematical.livejournal.com]

Eggplant Head. Report to me at once.

*Seifer

[vocaloidiot]

Wrong one, sir!

[dewdrop-pebbles.livejournal.com]

This is quite informative. Thank you for taking the time to explain. I knew not such others existed.

...however, some of the descriptions seem a bit excessive.

[roadrolling.livejournal.com]

Most of those descriptions are absolutely wrong!

[vocaloidiot]

Ah, don't mind it! You've never joshed around with family before?

[fierybluebird]

Wow. That's a horrible picture of Plum.

Why would he be a robot?

[vocaloidiot]

That's just the thing. To us, the question is 'why would he be a human?' - back home, he's a robot just like us.