Loss. [Action | Front Gate]

[haha-steelguard.livejournal.com]

[Not wanting to suck the life out of the quad and not feeling up to training, Snow had found himself a seat on one of the raised planters that held a few small trees and some decorative plants, out past the ID checkpoint in the landscaped area. There he sat, hands on his knees, head bowed, and thought.]

[In his right hand, he held a crystal.]

[As far as he knew... he had lost a sister. And he was amazed how much it hurt.]

Comments

[shops-a-lot.livejournal.com]

That's awful!

[Bulla sets her shopping bag down and goes to give Snow a big hug. It's a powerful hug from those skinny little arms of hers but not crushingly so. She doesn't bother worrying about whether it's appropriate for a cadet to hug an instructor in this case - Instructor Villiers is her friend, which supercedes the Garden Code of Conduct.]

I'm sorry to hear that, Instructor Villiers.

[haha-steelguard.livejournal.com]

[Snow's top of the list of Instructors who'll let her get away with this sort of behavior, and she should know it! Chuckling a little, he returns the hug.]

Thanks, but it's Serah I worry about most. Lightning is her sister, after all, and the way she was acting...

[shops-a-lot.livejournal.com]

Are you worried she's going to try to interfere with your relationship?

[Bulla's eyes narrow a little. He did say 'hate', and the way he didn't finish his sentence, it makes her wonder.]

Or worse?

[haha-steelguard.livejournal.com]

[At Bulla's first guess, he actually laughs.]

She can try, but it wouldn't do anything. Serah and I won't break and won't fail.

But still, Lightning's acting more like an enemy than a sister. I can't make that not hurt.

[shops-a-lot.livejournal.com]

No, you can't. But you can warn Serah, you can trust in her to have the strength to deal with it, and you can be there for her when she needs someone to talk to about it.

[haha-steelguard.livejournal.com]

[And now he's laughing more, but it's all very good-natured.]

Yeah, that's pretty much the plan. Maybe some ice cream for good measure.

[shops-a-lot.livejournal.com]

See? You've got it all figured out, Instructor Villiers.

[haha-steelguard.livejournal.com]

That should worry you. My usual level of planning is 'charge in, guns blazing'.

[Is he still a mass of concern and pain? Absolutely. But Bulla has legitimately cheered him up some, and as for the rest of it, there's only one person he'll intentionally trust with his self-doubt and fear, and she's not it. It's the hero's job to believe and do, after all... and that belief can make anything possible.]

[So now is the time to believe, and keep the doubt to himself, so the people who can share his faith can help banish that doubt.]

[shops-a-lot.livejournal.com]

Well, this isn't something that could solved like that...but I think you'll be fine.

[She pauses.]

The Headmaster might have some helpful advice.

[haha-steelguard.livejournal.com]

Hmm. I hadn't thought of that at all.

[He actually considers that for a moment.]

He might, but he's already done so much to help out everyone here I'd feel pretty bad reminding him of everything he had to deal with.

[shops-a-lot.livejournal.com]

You shouldn't feel bad asking him for advice, Instructor Villiers. It's okay to let other people help you sometimes.

I don't know how I could help, but if I can, you'll let me know, right?

[haha-steelguard.livejournal.com]

Hey now. I don't feel bad asking for advice, I feel bad for making a man relive what must've been a terrible time.

[Smiling, he gives her shoulder a fond tap with his fist.]

You got it. Promise.

[shops-a-lot.livejournal.com]

[Bulla brings her own smaller fist up and gives Snow's fist a light bump.]

I could always invite Serah to go shopping with me one day if you wanted to talk to Lightning in private.

[haha-steelguard.livejournal.com]

She doesn't really want to talk to me.

[Which was an UNDERSTATEMENT.]

[shops-a-lot.livejournal.com]

Even if she doesn't...you could always corner her and say that even if she doesn't like you, you'd like to sort things out as best you can for Serah's sake.

Then if she doesn't agree, well. It sucks, but it's her problem, not yours.

[haha-steelguard.livejournal.com]

Her problems are my problems. I care about her too. If I didn't, this would be easy.

[shops-a-lot.livejournal.com]

Yeah, but I meant that if you make the effort, it's up to her from there.

[haha-steelguard.livejournal.com]

Yeah. At some point I'm gonna have to. For Serah's sake... and Lightning's.

[He chuckles.]

I'm better at this when 'being the hero' just amounts to 'charge in, save the day, rescue the girl'.

[shops-a-lot.livejournal.com]

Yeah, somehow I can't see "expert diplomat" on your resume. Still, you know them both, and it's something that's important. I think you'll be fine.

[haha-steelguard.livejournal.com]

Hey, in my defense, armies are much easier to reason with than Light!

We'll work something out. Somehow.