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witchesreign2011-10-13 10:02 pm
bookshrew.livejournal.com) wrote in witchesreign2011-10-13 10:02 pm
knit three | bbs
Good day, Garden. I've recently made a discovery that I thought might be of use to some of you, so I'm graciously sharing it here for the good of the general populace.
Should you find that your relationship with a person has become overburdened with negative feelings and social missteps, there's a simple way of rectifying the matter. All one needs to do is send a handful of close companions back to their own worlds, much like mailing in the correct number of cereal boxtops, and you'll soon see the difficult person sent on their way as well.
Oh, I can hear you crying out in indignation now - you don't believe that this solves anything. Let me take the time to add that soon after their departure you'll be graced with the person's return, albeit without any memory of having ever set foot in this universe. You'll be presented with a blank slate, one which you're free to mold to your whims and manipulate away from the unsavory original situation with your memories of the past. Rather useful, don't you think?
As to how you should be expected to scrounge up the human price tag given the notorious temperamental nature of Time Compression, I have more excellent news. It seems that I have the innate ability to dismiss the people I come into contact with back into the ether with almost clockwork precision. Simply send your sacrifices my way and I'll do my best to exile them with the least amount of conversations possible.
I should warn you that I haven't quite mastered this power just yet; my endeavors may simply send another person spiraling into a coma, which really only counts as half payment in this scenario. Still, I believe that it's worth the risk to give it a try.
If you'd like to engage my services just leave a note here and I'll work out a schedule with you promptly. It isn't as if I have anyone else to occupy my time these days.
[and despite the vitriol and passive-aggression nearly reaching critical mass in that post, Rose doesn't really feel any better. if anything, it made her want to scream even more.]
Should you find that your relationship with a person has become overburdened with negative feelings and social missteps, there's a simple way of rectifying the matter. All one needs to do is send a handful of close companions back to their own worlds, much like mailing in the correct number of cereal boxtops, and you'll soon see the difficult person sent on their way as well.
Oh, I can hear you crying out in indignation now - you don't believe that this solves anything. Let me take the time to add that soon after their departure you'll be graced with the person's return, albeit without any memory of having ever set foot in this universe. You'll be presented with a blank slate, one which you're free to mold to your whims and manipulate away from the unsavory original situation with your memories of the past. Rather useful, don't you think?
As to how you should be expected to scrounge up the human price tag given the notorious temperamental nature of Time Compression, I have more excellent news. It seems that I have the innate ability to dismiss the people I come into contact with back into the ether with almost clockwork precision. Simply send your sacrifices my way and I'll do my best to exile them with the least amount of conversations possible.
I should warn you that I haven't quite mastered this power just yet; my endeavors may simply send another person spiraling into a coma, which really only counts as half payment in this scenario. Still, I believe that it's worth the risk to give it a try.
If you'd like to engage my services just leave a note here and I'll work out a schedule with you promptly. It isn't as if I have anyone else to occupy my time these days.
[and despite the vitriol and passive-aggression nearly reaching critical mass in that post, Rose doesn't really feel any better. if anything, it made her want to scream even more.]
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