witchesreign | o8. ♌ action in fisherman's horizon

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o8. ♌ action in fisherman's horizon

[Nepeta had strayed rather far from where the the Garden students and SeeDs were being kept while things were under expansion at Balamb. To say that a lot had been on her mind recently was an understatement, and now that finals were over and she had run out of distractions it was hard to push away the thoughts that had been plaguing her. She had always lead such a simple life before SGRUB, and even after that had always played the role of the listener, hearing others out and distracting herself from her own worries and concerns with theirs. This had only doubled ever since gaining these powers which she had learned were absolutely perfect for understanding another, and seeing their fears and where they were coming from.

What it all boiled down to, was that when met with any sort of distressing situation of her own, Nepeta had absolutely no idea how to sort out her own feelings or what to do. For all her strength and all the enjoyment she got out of a good hunt, she always avoided confrontation of any kind and never really let herself think about what she considered 'unnecessary things'. She almost always gave in when Equius demanded anything, she always pretended not to notice whenever the other trolls insulted her or treated her in a demeaning manner, even in her roleplay she avoided anything even slightly malicious. An unusual thing for one who belonged to a race that delighted in such things.

Nepeta had never really considered herself particularly different from other trolls, despite how many times she'd been told otherwise by others, and most particularly her moirail who tried very hard to reach her how to behave like a proper troll. Honestly, Nepeta had always sort of ignored him whenever he talked like that, assuming that it was just his elitist side showing through but lately she had begun to realize that he was right. In fact, in retrospect he had been right about a lot of things.

She lifted her gaze from the notebook she had been scribbling is, sliding the shades she always wore to cover her now strange looking eyes to look down at her reflection in the water. Funny how she had never thought to look in a mirror ever since gaining this strange power. She supposed that she that she would have been spared having to look upon her own 'weakness' but such was not the case. Like with anyone she now looked directly at, she could see the images slowly shifting into place, becoming clearer behind her.

Yes, he had been very right.

[That's why Nepeta had left for a while, seeking solitude not in her dorm, or in Vriska's, or even the cave she had claimed as her own in the training center. No, instead she had gone out to the city later in the day when there weren't so many people out in the streets. The few that were still out and about mostly ignored her. She sat on the ledge of a fountain, a thermos of tea at her side and notebook open in her lap full of writing in alternian text.

She had never been much of a writer before, but she was beginning to find catharsis in it, and while it didn't answer any of her questions, at the very least it help her to organize her thoughts enough to least realize what some of those questions even were.

((ooc; still answering to threads on event log! will get to everyone, but i wanted this up before the events end/they left fisherman's horizon. expect tags on this entry to be slow till Im done with those ^^;))

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[Water usually makes Marco nervous. But now that he's not so endangered by it, the bespectacled human hops up to sit next to her.]

Hey there Nepeta.

[She starts a bit, but relaxes when she sees it's just Marco. She slips the sunglasses back on and gives him a smile.]

Hi Marco! Enjoying the quiet out here, too?

Yeah. It's relaxing, eh? Are you studying for something? [Gestures to the writing.]

[Ronnae wasn't that far from where Nepeta had taken to sitting, and yet it didn't seemed like she had noticed her. In fact, it seemed as if she was too involved in her own little world while she was out here.

She had sought out a rather empty area where she could peacefully explore as she hadn't had much of a chance since arriving in this world, always the timid one when it came to being around large crowds. Her bright, teal eyes moving from location to location, looking as curious as ever as she took in the area to memory. It was a rather pleasant place, and the lack of people around allowed her to keep her hood down, letting her long, wine colored ponytails sway as she walked at a relaxed pace.]

[At last Nepeta pulled herself away from her reflection, shaking her head. She wondered what the other trolls would think of her if they had seen that. It would probably be best not to talk to them about it...but then she didn't really think anyone but a troll could fully understand why what she was seeing left her so confused.

It was by chance, really, that she spotted Ronnae since she too was deep in thought, but spot her she did.]

Ronnae! Over here!

[Ronnae turned surprised, looking over in the direction of the voice curiously before she spotted who it was. It was her roommate, and only friend she had made and trusted since her arrival in the place. She knew more about her than anyone else... And she had a lot of feelings for her because she could trust her to keep them safe.

She made her way over, her stride as relaxed and shy as ever until she sat at her side.]

H-hey~ What'cha up to? Didn't think I'd run into anyone over here.

[She returned the smile easily, slipping her shades back on.]

Neither did I. I'm just looking fur some quiet I guess. Wanted to see more of the city too, give it a second chance. [she looked around.]

It's real purrty in its own way, but still not a place fur me.

What about you?

Oddly enough... the same thing actually... I don't do well in crowds... and it looked rather peaceful and empty on this side.

N-not that I mind you being here at all tho! It's... actually really pleasant to have found you here.

I...

H-how have you been?

I'm glad you're here too.

[It didn't surprise her too much. She had noticed how Ronnae was shyer than even herself, and after seeing the visions she understood why. In truth she was still a little rattled by them, even if she was able to hide it well. It hadn't changed how she view her dear friend, but it did make her worry a little about saying or doing something to bring those memories to her mind again.]

I've been purrty good. Have had a lot on my mind though, so also purrty confused.

Anything you'd like to talk about?

[She asked concerned... ever since that day she had been worried about what her friend saw, hoping that she hadn't upset her or anything.]

You know I'm here for ya right?

[Her smiles widened a bit and she nodded, expression now becoming thoughtful. She did know that, and her momentary silence came not from any discomfort but simply because she wasn't quite sure how to phrase to feelings, or what some of the questions running through her mind were.]

[It took a bit, but she finally found one that she thought that Ronnae might be able to help her out with.]

Ronnae, what do you think of humans? Humans in general, I mean.

[That... was a tough one considering how she felt of others in general. She took a moment to process her own thoughts, looking for a few before turning back to face her friend.]

Truthfully, it's kind of hard to say... I've always... sorta avoided other races in general... Mainly because I'm a half breed and my kind isn't very accepted in the normal society. But... Like any other race?

There's good and bad people... People who will go out of their way to hurt you and people who will sacrifice themselves to save you and love you.

Humans are just like any other race as far as I can tell. So I guess I take it as it comes and hope that I encounter more good than bad.

[There's good and bad people...humans are just like any other race.]

[Even just those words brought a torrent of thoughts to her. Five months ago she would have readily agreed. She use to believe that everyone always had a choice in how they acted, no matter where they came from or what their history was like. That was why she had always thought that Equius was speaking nonsense when he spoke about highblood and their predisposition to violence. Why she had always thought that the hemospectrum was nonsense.

Why, she hadn't believed Gamzee had truly become murderous when first told, even when it had come from Karkat.

Yet look at what had become of him, and looking back on everything that her race and home planet had done and been like she realized that they really were, truly terrible. Not just the highbloods, but even things some of the others had done. As much as she care for Terezi and respected her, to say she was completely innocent in any misdeeds would be delusional.

When she had first come to learn of humans, and the more she saw of them here she had truly thought them saint-like, espcially in comparison to her own race. After gaining these powers, she realized that they were without fault. They too did horrific things, and it left her feeling somewhat disillusioned.]

So you don't think there is such a thing as a perfect race?

[Ronnae could relate, that was for sure. The history of both her heritages was very long, and it had many dire and dark paths, bloody roads and horrifying secrets that left a lot of the 'nicer' races with an unpleasant taste in her mouth and a knot in their stomach... for those strong enough to stomach it in the first place.

But everyone had a chance to do both good and bad, of that she was certain... Just her own past was full of things done to her, things she'd done, both good and bad...

she shook her head in response.]

If there is? I haven't heard or seen of them. Even the 'perfect' race that was encountered in my world turned out to have dark secrets of their own, feeding on souls and becoming dark and twisted. And they were supposed to be the embodiment of all that was good and holy in our universe...

We... we all have our flaws and merits just as much as we have our good and bad sides. I believe there can't be good without bad and vice-versa, it's about a balance.

[She bit her lip, before voicing the next question.]

What about bad then? Do you think there are races that are inherently evil? [The question sounded strange on her lips because she didn't even know how to quantify something like that. Just how much of the populace of a race had to be 'bad' to considering them inherently so? Did the fact that trolls exonerated murder and other violent acts doom them to such a title from the start?]

[Her response was almost immediate as she nodded...]

Yeah, there are. But, [She smiled, looking down in thought as she rubbed the top of her knee absentmindedly.] That, by all means doesn't mean they're all going to be bad... or that they HAVE to be bad... One of my mothers... she came from a very evil race, one of the many races that make up the Burning Legion... the biggest threat to my world... She learned to be compassionate, affectionate, caring and loving. And while she still has that predisposition to be fierce, and relentless, she has also been the nicest, and most loving person in our family, loved by many even in the city we live in...

Her brother, my uncle was the same way. Cruel, and mischievous... he would do anything that would bring him pleasure... even if it was vile and horrid... but he also changed, little by little, enjoying the pleasures of life in a different manner. A caring, selfless way.

So while there might be predisposed evil races out there, that doesn't mean that everyone of said race will be, or has to be. That's why I never judge anyone, regardless of race or background.

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o8. ♌ action in fisherman's horizon

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